“I’m having this abortion, and it will be my secret that I carry
for the rest of my life.”
When I went through my divorce, I didn’t know who I was anymore.
I started making reckless decisions. I figured, who would want me? I have two children, I’m divorced, and I’m 34. I met a guy online, and I knew it was going to be a physical encounter.
I wasn’t looking for a relationship.
Two weeks later I was driving home and something just didn’t feel right. I went to the store, got the test and used it. It said PREGNANT. I fell to the floor in my bedroom, and I just sobbed. I didn’t know what to do. I had no one to tell, because I knew the second I told someone I would be held accountable for my actions.
I called the next day and scheduled an OB appointment. At first, I planned to have the child. After I talked to the father, I Googled abortion and called the first number that came up.
I called my OB and said I was cancelling my appointment, because I’d decided to terminate the pregnancy. Within two seconds my phone rang, and it was her.
“Molly, before you do anything, call this number. The program is called Alternatives. They will be there to listen. They’re not going to judge you with whatever decision you make. They will support you. Please, just promise me you’ll call them,” she said.
I called them right after I got off the phone with her. This sweet, sweet woman answered the phone. I was hysterically crying.
“I don’t know what to do,” I said. “I’m having this abortion, and it will be my secret that I can carry for the rest of my life. And nobody ever has to know. I don’t have to explain to my children that they have a sibling who’s not from their dad. I don’t have to explain to my family that I wasn’t conducting myself with the morals and values they had raised me with.”
The woman was so kind.
“Don’t write this baby’s story for it,” she said. “Let God work through this child.” This counselor showed me the light in this program of Alternatives. And they walked through this journey with me.
Alternatives was my life raft. I was drowning without a life preserver, but this program saved me, and it saved my son and it saved the relationship I have with my other two children.